10 things about me
1. Single, white, female like the fucking movie. I am single, never been married, I live alone. I am fucking alone. Therefore, I have no personal life or career. What do I have?
I have severe fibromyalgia, mitral valve pulmonerasis (heart disease), major depression, leaky gut syndrome, migraines, irritable bowel syndrome and the worst of it “candida albicans” throughout my digestive system. It is suprising that I haven’t died yet!
2. Just turned 35 and my life is ultra-shitty mess. People say that 35 is the best age blah blah, well it is a huge lie. At least for me. This is the worst time ever. Actually, I do not recall a single happy moment in the last 3 years.
4. I have high IQ (over 160 and it is a curse), I hold a graduate degree in psychology that is even ridiculous cause I have major depression right now. Ironic? I wish I could laugh at it. I am in deep shit and I want to fix that and share my daily efforts with whoever wants to read.
5. I have spent half of my life ”trying to be something or someone” both for me and others. For the time being, I have always been too scared to do something bold like keeping an honest online diary. Well, that did not work out so well for the past 35 yrs, did it? So I quit that strategy cause maybe you can give me some support.
6. EVERY FUCKING THING I WRITE HERE IS 100% TRUE. By the way, my real name is not Alex. But it is my favorite one.
7. I smoke like a chimney. I am not proud of it. I just cannot quit.
8. I read a lot. Learning is my passion. I like to write but I had problems writing on daily basis. Hope my followers help me with that. I can draw and I will share my drawings through this page.
9. I used to have a successful career until this year. And then, I got fired/forced to quit. I used to have a very fit body size 4 and now it turned to a 10 in 3 months. I use anti-depressants. I sleep a lot. I feel fat, ugly and sick all the time. I really want to heal both physiologically & psychologically and get better. I try everything but they don’t seem to work.
10. My35project is my original idea to reach 35 goals this year and try to succeed in both my private and work life.
Thanks for reading.
Dec 21, 2014